The Psychology on Different Parenting Styles
Know Your Parenting Style and Its Effect to Your Children
In early 1960s, psychologist Diana Baumrind led a research on one hundred preschool–age kids. After spending years doing parental interviews, conducting naturalistic observation, and experimenting with different research methods, she concluded that there are three different parenting styles that parents follow. In 1983, a couple of decades later after Baumrind’s research, Maccoby and Martin suggested adding a fourth parenting style.
Also known as indulgent parenting, this type of parenting style lacks structure and discipline. Permissive parents rarely impose rules and only step in when there is a big issue. They are often heard saying “kids will be kids” and allow their children to misbehave.
The problem with this parenting strategy is that parents may take on a friend role rather than a parent role. Children crave authority and limitations, and that is where permissive parents fall short of. Children of permissive parents are also likely to struggle academically and do not appreciate authority and rules.
Authoritarian parents are cold, aloof, and status-oriented. They enforce house regulations and expect the kids to obey the rules with no questions asked. If children ask why, they are usually answered with, “Because I said so.” Communication is one-sided, and children are not allowed to make decisions or voice out their opinions.
Children who grow up with authoritarian parents don’t have a problem coping with rules. However, they may struggle with self-esteem issues, and are likely to exhibit aggression because of the years spent on resenting their parents.
Authoritative parents also enforce rules, but offer a few exceptions. Children are provided with explanations for each rule, and parents are willing to compromise with their kids. Authoritative parenting is said to be the most effective parenting style. It enforces good behavior through setting limitations, constant communication, and mutual respect.
Children who are raised by authoritative parents are likely to develop healthy relationship with parents and peers. They grow up to be responsible, self-regulated, and socially responsible adults.
Parents under this type may fulfill the basic needs of their children but are generally disconnected from their child’s life. This could be the worst parenting discipline because children lack guidance and nurturing—children are basically expected to fend for themselves!
There a few reasons for this like substance abuse, lack of parenting knowledge, and mental health problems.
Children who grow up with uninvolved parents have higher chances of dropping off from school. They are also likely to suffer from low self-esteem, develop behavioral problems, and grow up to be needy or clingy.
There are cases wherein parents with authoritative style raise children who are disobedient. While children of permissive parents get straight A’s in school and is self-confident. As a parental advice, ask yourself what it is that you want your children to learn. Adapt an ideal discipline strategy, so your children can grow up to be a responsive, responsible, and successful adult.